Feral Dust Bunnies (Offbeat Crimes Book 4) Page 5

  When he returned to the squad room, Krisk held up a hand, palm up. Well?

  “It was fine. He was nice,” Wolf grumbled. “He was really nice and we talked.”

  As they walked out to their squad car, Krisk’s snort was more forceful than usual and even came with an eye roll for good measure.

  “Yeah, yeah, I know. I shouldn’t have been so nervous. But I’m still nervous. All tight and shaky. Hate feeling like this.”

  For anyone else, the reptilian hand on his shoulder might have been unnerving. Wolf took it as the comfort it was meant to be and pulled out into traffic.

  * * * *

  “Alex!” Mom called from the kitchen the second Wolf walked in the door. “Come get your kitten!”

  The urgency and exasperation in her voice had him skidding into the kitchen at a run. “What? What’s wrong?”

  Kitten was crying, of course, and latched on to Mom’s jeans where she’d managed to claw halfway up one calf while Mom tried to finish dinner. The moment she heard Wolf’s voice, though, she let go and flumped in a kitten pile on the kitchen floor before she scrambled to her feet and baby-wobbled to him, still crying as if someone were pulling her tail off.

  Confused and concerned, Wolf scooped her up. She’d no sooner snuggled into the crook of his elbow when Mom handed him a formula bottle.

  “I’ve never seen anything like this. She won’t eat for me. She’s cried herself into exhaustion twice, then wakes up and starts crying again. Please feed your kitten before you do anything else. Poor baby.” Mom turned back to the stove as the kitten latched on for Wolf and started purr-drinking. “Most extreme case of imprinting I’ve ever seen.”

  “What am I supposed to do?” Baffled, Wolf eased onto one of the kitchen stools, watching the kitten settle into sleepy contentment.

  Mom half-turned to give him a smile. “Alex, it’s all right. We’ll figure this out. Don’t look like the world is ending. Maybe I can bring her to you for a midday feeding while she’s still on the milk replacement. Once she starts eating kitten food, she’ll probably be more independent.”

  “Okay.” Of course, Mom knew what to do. She and Dad had taken care of different species all their lives.

  “And Alex?”

  “Yeah?”

  “For pity’s sake, name the poor thing. We can’t keep calling her Kitten.”

  “Oh.”

  He put the empty bottle on the counter and stared at the tiny bundle of persistence snuggled against him. Despite hunger and loneliness, she’d stood up to creatures several dozen times her size to tell them what she wanted. The kitten yawned, showing her baby fangs, and pawed at his shirt buttons, wanting to get closer. He felt like a terrible foster dad for abandoning her all day, so he let her crawl between the buttonholes and nestle against his stomach while he did a quick thesaurus search on his phone.

  “I’m gonna call her Audacity.”

  Chapter Five

  Audacity wouldn’t let Wolf leave the house the next day. She pounced on his boots, batting and chewing on the laces so he couldn’t tie them. When he placed her in her box, she did a mighty kitten leap, hooked her claws to the top edge and pulled herself out so she could pounce on his footwear again.

  Mom was in the basement, sorting through some of Dad’s things. She’d looked so sad and drawn when she’d said she was going down there, he didn’t want to bug her. At least Audacity had eaten for Wolf that morning, so she wasn’t crying. But if he left the house, she would, and Mom would have no peace.

  Feeling like he was sneaking out of the house after curfew, he took his lunch bag out of the fridge and added Audacity’s formula and kitten food. Then he grabbed her cardboard carrier from the hall closet and filled it with blanket, new fuzzy stuffed octopus and kitten, in that order.

  Carrier and lunch bag in one hand, he opened the basement door a crack and yelled down, “I’m going, Mom! See you tonight!”

  From somewhere in the basement she said a distracted goodbye, and Wolf slunk out, amazed that Audacity was uncharacteristically quiet. He should’ve told Mom he was taking the kitten, but there would’ve been an argument and he’d be late again. He promised himself he would text her later so she didn’t worry.

  At Krisk’s house, the lizard man opened the passenger side door and pointed to the carrier.

  “She’s making my mom crazy, so she’s coming to work.” Wolf’s voice was gruff and confrontational, though he tried his best to sound reasonable. “We’re on desks today. Don’t want to hear it.”

  With great care, Krisk lifted the carrier in his clawed hands. He snuffled at the little holes on the side. Audacity snuffled back. When Krisk got in the car with the carrier in his lap, she remained quiet, apparently signaling that Krisk was acceptable.

  “Cool. Um. You don’t mind holding her?”

  Krisk shook his head, though his eye ridges still crinkled.

  “I know. It’s not a great solution. I just needed to give Mom a break.”

  When they got to the squad room, Wolf checked the carrier and saw to his relief that Audacity had fallen asleep in the car. Good. He stashed the whole carrier under his desk, certain that she would be safe and undetected during roll call. In this building? He should’ve known better.

  Nothing looked out of place when the officers filed back into the squad room until Wolf walked past Jeff and Vance’s shared desk where he could see his. The carrier had been pulled out and opened. Wolf’s heart did a sickening lurch-thump. Oh, no, no, no. Where is—

  Three more steps answered the question before he could finish thinking it. LJ and Hunter hunkered on the floor behind his desk with Audacity between them. Edgar, oh, crap, Edgar was with them, hopping back and forth, which scared Wolf all over again. As he stalked toward them, he realized Edgar had one end of a piece of yarn in his beak and he was trailing the other end along the floor so Audacity could pounce on it and wrestle with it.

  Edgar, the troublemaking, foul-mouthed neon raven, was playing with her.

  “Um, guys.” Wolf wasn’t sure if he was happy the kitten had found playmates or pissed that they’d possibly endangered her. “You really should’ve—”

  He choked off his own words since Hunter rushed to him, tugging on his sleeve and pointing enthusiastically at the kitten while Audacity stumble-ran to Wolf, crying to be picked up, and Edgar cawed out, “Baby wolf!”

  “She’s not a wolf, Edgar,” Wolf growled as he scooped her up.

  “Your fucking baby! Baby wolf!”

  Mewing in what could’ve been interpreted as where the heck have you been, Audacity climbed onto Wolf’s shoulder and snuggled up against his neck. “Don’t cuss in front of the kitten, Edgar.”

  “I can’t believe you just said that.” Kyle wandered up and offered Edgar his arm as a perch. “Is your kitten our new squad mascot?”

  “She’s not my kitten. I’m just fostering her for ACC.”

  “Baby wolf!” Edgar screamed once more and flew off to his perch in the corner.

  “She’s not—oh, never mind.”

  Carrington sidled up and, to Wolf’s embarrassment, the rest of the squad wasn’t far behind. “She certainly looks like she’s yours. Quite firmly attached, I’d say.”

  “But I’m just—”

  “She’s beautiful,” Kash interrupted, reaching over to stroke a tiny fuzzy ear. “What’s her name?”

  Wolf stared around the semi-circle of charmed police officers. “Audacity. Um, could we maybe keep it quiet, though? I don’t know if the lieutenant—”

  “If the lieutenant what, Officer Wolf?” The sharp edge to Lieutenant Dunfee’s voice dropped Wolf’s heart in an icy ball at his feet. “What in all dark gods’ names is going on in here?”

  Belatedly, Wolf took Audacity off his shoulder, and cupped her in his hands as if he could hide her. Of course, she squirmed and chirp-mewed so that did less than no good. Glaring, Mia Dunfee held out her hand and waited until Wolf hesitantly put Audacity into it.

  “You
won’t, um, sacrifice her, will you, ma’am?” Wolf asked in a strangled voice.

  Lieutenant Dunfee gave a snort that rivaled one of Krisk’s. “The god doesn’t want kittens. From ACC, you said?”

  “Yes, ma’am.”

  Her frown deepened as Audacity sat still and attentive on her palm. “You. Kitten. You are not to distract my officers, do you understand?”

  Miew.

  “And I will not have the squad room smell like cat pee.”

  Miiew.

  With a sharp glance at Wolf, Lieutenant Dunfee demanded, “What arrangements have you made for her?”

  “I, um, her carrier—”

  LJ shot up off the floor, one sleeve pointing straight up as if he were raising his hand in class. Hunter followed suit, bouncing up and down in the air in front of the lieutenant.

  “It looks like you have babysitting volunteers,” Lieutenant Dunfee said in her driest tone.

  Wolf swallowed hard. “She doesn’t like being separated. From me.”

  “Officer Wolf, you will not take a kitten with you on patrol. That’s a direct order.”

  Frantically, LJ waved his sleeves above his collar. When he had the lieutenant’s attention again, he swept them in a wide arc around Wolf’s desk, then pointed back and forth between himself and Hunter in rapid succession.

  Lieutenant Dunfee nodded. “That’s sensible. If the two of you watch over her beside Officer Wolf’s desk, she won’t suffer separation anxiety, and if he’s out on patrol, his scent is still here for her.”

  Mieew.

  “How did she get all that from sleeve-waving?” Shira whispered to Carrington.

  He shrugged. “Don’t have the foggiest. But Kash does it, too.”

  “Is that acceptable, Officer Wolf?” the lieutenant asked sharply.

  Wolf was still trying to catch up, completely befuddled. “I…yeah. I mean, yes, ma’am.”

  “Good. What’s her name?”

  “It’s, um, Audacity, ma’am.”

  The unthinkable happened. With the kitten still perched politely in her palm, one corner of Lieutenant Dunfee’s mouth twitched up. Oh, it wasn’t a smile but it was closer than anyone had ever seen. “A more perfect name there never was.”

  She handed Audacity back, who immediately attacked one of Wolf’s shirt buttons, gnawing on it with her tiny needle teeth. The squad dispersed, the lieutenant returned to her lair, and Wolf sat in his chair with a relieved oomph. His heart was just returning to normal rhythms when his phone sang out Mom’s Born Free text alert.

  “Oh, crap.”

  Alex? I can’t find Audacity!

  He rushed through typing back—

  I hv her. Srry.

  You took her to WORK?

  “Damn it.”

  I have all her stuff. It’s OK, Mom. She has peeps watching her.

  Mom typed for a long time, then finally sent—

  They better not be peeps. Marshmallow chicks should not watch kittens.

  For the second time in fifteen minutes, Wolf sagged in relief. If Mom was making bad jokes, she wasn’t so mad anymore. He texted back that there was no marshmallow involved and finally settled in to get some work done. Peace more or less descended as the rest of the squad went out on their patrol routes, the quiet only interrupted with the occasional smart remark from Edgar. For her part, Audacity was happy to play with LJ and Hunter as long as she could scramble back to check in with Wolf from time to time. She did have one odd moment where she became furious with something under Wolf’s desk with little spitting hiss attempts and some back-arched hopping. When Wolf checked, nothing was under his desk besides a surge protector and his own feet, which didn’t seem to be the targets of kitten ire.

  She finally fell asleep with her octopus next to Wolf’s keyboard and napped until the end of shift. While he was careful to stay focused on his job—the last thing he wanted was to give the lieutenant a reason to say Audacity was distracting—he did find his eyes wandering to her every few minutes. He stared in wonder at how her tiny body expanded and deflated as she breathed in sleep, at the perfect ebony ovals of her pads, at the way her black on black stripes faded in and out of the light.

  Not distracted, no. Just watchful. Interested.

  But those little black beans were so damn cute…

  Focus. He sent a message to ask Greg and Shira to spot check some of the alleys along their route, since they were closest to the two mummified animal sites. Throughout the day, he took several calls about paranormal creatures and Krisk parceled them out to the teams in the field. A quiet, routine day.

  Toward the end of shift, Wolf’s text alert went off again, this time the generic one. The few people who had his number all had their own alerts, so he was about to dismiss it as a sales call when he remembered the one person he had recently given his number. He fumbled the phone out of his pocket, dropped it once and finally spotted Jason’s name on his screen.

  Free for dinner tonight?

  Wolf had to put the phone down and wipe his palms on his pants. When he tried to pick the phone up again, his hands trembled. Why were his hands shaky and sweaty? It was just a text. Jason wasn’t even in the same building.

  Dinner with Krisk and Mom tonight.

  The second he sent it, Wolf sucked in a horrified breath. That was going to sound like he was making excuses, wouldn’t it? Quickly he typed a follow-up.

  But any other night is good.

  This week.

  That was starting to sound picky.

  Or whatever you want.

  “I’m so bad at this.” Wolf put his head on the desk with a thump, momentarily forgetting that Audacity was there. The miniature earthquake running through her bed woke Audacity with a startled mew. She seemed to figure out that the world wasn’t in danger of shaking apart and wobbled over to touch her nose to Wolf’s.

  “I’m okay, little girl. Just feeling stupid.” Wolf stroked her head with his forefinger as her eyes closed on a purr. They popped up when his phone chimed again.

  How about my house on Friday for dinner? Takeout?

  “Oh. He’s still asking.” Wolf sat up again, scooping Audacity into his lap. What did that mean, when someone saw you being stupid and still tried to ask you out? Was it interest overriding stupid? Was it pity?

  OK.

  Jason sent back time and address and Wolf stared at the messages for a full three minutes. “That’s the first time anyone’s asked me out. I guess his house isn’t really out but dating kind of out?”

  Across the desk, Krisk counted off four fingers, then held his open palm out to Wolf.

  “Yeah, but those other times I was dating, I asked. Or someone set it up.” Wolf’s hands had calmed petting kitten fur at least. “Never been this nervous, either.”

  Krisk gave him both open palms in question.

  “I don’t know why. It’s just…he’s different. So calm and sure. He… I said things to him at lunch I just don’t tell humans and he didn’t even look at me funny. Gets me all flustered.”

  With a nod, Krisk turned his attention back to his computer screen, apparently satisfied with the explanation of once-wolf and human relations. Most humans would’ve said it was impossible to say what Krisk thought about anything but it just took practice. His thought processes were hard to figure out sometimes, not impossible. It took someone who wanted to try more than anything else as Mom showed when they went to Krisk’s for dinner that evening.

  Mom loved the strawberry and spinach salad Krisk made. He was tail-thumpingly enthusiastic about her apple pie. With the help of his photo albums and some texting, they talked about bulbs and azaleas, about Krisk’s beautiful hardwood floors and the books they had in common. Wolf got to listen most of the time, both of them sparing him from having to construct actual sentences, and he managed to calm down enough that dinner at Jason’s started to sound like a great idea.

  Until Friday evening rolled around.

  Wolf stood in front of his closet with the minutes tic
king by, completely paralyzed. Any knowledge he’d gained over the years about being human abandoned him as he tried to get dressed to see Jason.

  “Are you all right, sweetheart?” Mom stopped on her way past his room with a new book in hand.

  “I can’t remember how to human,” Wolf said with a frustrated snarl.

  “Oh? You’re still using your words. That’s good. What part of humaning is causing the problem?”

  “What am I supposed to wear?”

  Mom laughed at that and Wolf shot her a dark look. “Oh, for heaven’s sake, Alex, I’m not making fun of you. But everyone goes through this with a new relationship.” She bustled over to his closet. “He said takeout, right?”

  “Yeah.”

  “So he wants to keep things casual. But you still want to look nice.” She handed over a pair of black jeans. “Now pick a T-shirt you like and you’re done.”

  Wolf pawed through his T-shirt drawer and pulled out a Tori Amos T-shirt. “No, not that. What if he doesn’t like her?” He tossed that on the bed and pulled out a Totoro one but discarded it as maybe childish, then a Yosemite one as too boring.

  “Alex. Stop.” Mom put a hand on his arm and gently pushed him away from the bureau. “You’re making a mess and making yourself upset.” She reached in and pulled out a bright blue T-shirt with a moonlit desert-scape in black and silver. “There. That one.”

  “Really?”

  “Yes. If I say it doesn’t matter as much as you think it does right now, I know you’re not going to believe me. So that one.” She smoothed a bit of his shaggy salt-and-pepper hair behind his ear. “You like him that much? That you’re this nervous?”